Unhappy Beginnings

laschatzi:

A little season 4 canon divergence, set during the peaceful 6 weeks, because it always bothered me that nobody ever seems to be much interested in learning about Killian’s troubled past, even if it was “like a million years ago”. And it’s not like he’s got nothing to tell. @effulgentcolors and @thesschesthair are partly to blame.

summary: during the peaceful 6 weeks after Gold’s banishment, Emma is determined to find out more about Killian’s beginnings

word count: ~4k

rating: G and P for pain, but also C for comfort

also on: ao3 and ff.net

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It’s
been four weeks now that Gold was forced to leave town, no other
threats have presented themselves, and the feeling of peace is almost
unreal. Since the first curse has been broken, there hasn’t been such
a long period without a villain’s scheme of some sort looming over
Storybrooke.

But
Emma doesn’t complain; even though this period of quietude doesn’t
give only the opportunity for pleasurable occupations, it’s still an
important chance to process things, to deal with experiences that
could easily leave unnoticed marks if swept under the rug. And it’s
so tempting to forget some of the stuff that has happened, and not so
long ago she maybe would have been inclined to do exactly that, but
she knows better now. Her new self is determined to quit running
away, and that includes not suppressing feelings, not even unpleasant
ones such as worries and fears.

So,
she’s trying to deal with what happened, in particular with Killian
being under the control of Gold, his heart ripped out, and almost
killed by his old nemesis. My oldest friend, he’d called him
in cruel mockery. Emma can’t even begin to imagine what that must
have felt like for Killian, to be forced to do terrible things, to
know his loved ones were in the very real danger to be sacrificed for
Gold’s quest to free himself from the dagger, and to know that his
life was doomed and that his own unavoidable death would ultimately
allow The Dark One what he’d always wanted: to have infinite power,
be free from the command of the dagger, and keep the woman he
loved… well, in his own twisted way.

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